Spring Series: What You Need to Know About the Enneagram Eight! | Melanie Erickson

enneagram podcast type 8 Apr 18, 2023

Hey there, friend!

Have you found yourself saying things like:

"You shouldn't let people walk all over you."
"I'll just take care of it myself!"
"Why doesn't she stand on her own two feet?"
"Who is going to be MY advocate?"

If these aren’t something you would say, are these familiar phrases that you hear said by a loved one?

If so . . . you might be an Eight or know an Enneagram Eight.

I would love to invite you to join me on a journey of self-discovery and compassion to learn insights about the personality type often known as the challenger, non-conformist, protector, and the conqueror.

And, if you know an Eight or want others to know more about the Eight personality Type, go ahead and follow that prompting to share this podcast with them. Just use this podcast platform’s share feature so this episode can give others an opportunity to learn more about the value of the Enneagram Eight.

[1:00] Welcome to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast!

[2:31] What do you need to know about the Enneagram Eight?

Well, friend, we would need way more than the time you want to give in one sitting because the nuances of each Enneagram Type are as unique as there are shades of color, but this episode will offer some highlights to help you understand more about the perspective of an Eight.

[3:36] What does an Enneagram Eight look like as a child?

Independent.
Do not like being controlled.
Sometimes they are loners.
Take charge and lead others.

[4:43] What strengths do the Enneagram Eights have?

An Eight’s strength is in their decision-making abilities. They strongly desire justice, fairness, or control over the outcome.

[5:25] What is the Eight’s communication style?

The Eight’s communication preference falls within the Assertive stance in the Enneagram, which means they are future-focused and are oriented to what must be accomplished next.

When it comes to expressing feelings, it’s essential to understand that the Eight is feeling repressed. While this might seem incongruent based on their passion, passion itself is not a full range of emotion; it’s purely one emotional expression.

[6:42] What are the wings for an Enneagram Eight?

Like all Enneagram Types, the Eight’s wings are on either side of its number on the diagram. The Enneagram 8w7 tends to be more extroverted, enterprising, energetic, quick, materialistic, interested in power, and egocentric. The Enneagram 8w9 is more mild-mannered, gentle, receptive, enjoys their comforts, is people-oriented, and lends their quiet strength.

[7:12] What traits does an Eight take on when triggered, and on the flip side, when they are practicing rhythms of stillness?

Focus on these truth statements:

May I be openhearted.
May I be loving.
May I be vulnerable.

[8:05] What happens when an Enneagram Eight consents to stillness?

When an Eight deliberately consents to stillness, it's not a matter of acquiescence but rather a submission to trust God. Instead of overdoing it or using an assertive posture in prayer, resting in peace creates vulnerability with our Creator. These spiritual rhythms engage the quality traits of the Enneagram Two.

[8:46] Here are three tips for an Enneagram Eight to remember!

Regularly find a physical activity to give a positive outlet to your energy.
Pause for 10 second intervals frequently to slow down your reactive impulse and move to responsive engagement with others.
Practice vulnerable conversations. Even though this can cause anxiety initially, over time, this can become more natural and comfortable.

[9:20] Let me introduce an Enneagram Eight, my client, Melanie Erickson.

Melanie is from Canada, and instead of retiring, she is ready to reFire during this new season of life! She has been married for 40 years to an Enneagram 9 farmer. Her greatest joys are their four children and eleven grandchildren. She was first introduced to the Enneagram as a member of a local woman’s board. The Director wanted to use it as a tool to understand her employees and each other. She was intrigued by the concept, origin, and application. She didn’t type herself, but ten years later, a family member mentioned that she and her husband were taking Enneagram elective classes. Melanie wanted to revisit and research the Enneagram because she felt like her communication with her husband was an endless cycle of conflict, chaos, and hurt. Withdrawal, silence, and distancing herself was on repeat in her life. Being tough wasn’t going to get her the love she desired.

She Googled, read books, took the tests, completed self-directed courses, and listened to podcasts. She felt deflated but not defeated at the daunting and overwhelming amount of information. God’s influence through, in, with, and around her was the change that desired. She couldn’t seem to find the mountain peak that would cause lasting change in her life. The pain of where she was led her to seek outside help. Acknowledging this was the catalyst to help her repair and rewire. She needed guidance, action plans, and accountability. This was when she found the Wholehearted Enneagram Summit. Amy’s true passion, depth, and dedication to the Enneagram from a Biblical standpoint sold her! Amy held space for Melanie, made her feel heard, helped her articulate feelings she couldn’t find words for, reasoned together, shared resources, prayed together, and reminded her of her position in God. As much as Melanie thrives on a challenge, she needed her heart to be championed. Amy was always there with honest, thought-provoking questions. She focused on the WHY behind Melanie’s actions and not just the WHAT.

Melanie felt misplaced for much of her life as a woman: “too much, too fast, too bold, too strong, too everything.” What Melanie knows for sure is that she is strong and can do all things through Christ. She is adventurous and fun-loving, and she can appreciate where she’s been and where she’s going. Her Enneagram Internal Profile (EIP) has given her a life-saving rhythm. She now intentionally moves forward and chooses the healthy traits of a 2 and that being vulnerable to those she trusts is her strength, and it has been her greatest growth path. She can honestly say with sincerity that she loves her husband for who he is and that his presence truly matters to her. They have laid bare their true selves and are on a healing journey together.

We all have a story within God’s story. He is in control, and we are not. What an adventure!

Isaiah 40:31 “Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Micah 6:8 “And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

[19:49] Deanna Sudom closes the episode with a heartfelt prayer.

“Father, thank you for the hearts of the protectors, Lord, I thank you that they often pave the way in justice, that they lead without apology and they have discernment for things that need to be accomplished. But Lord, I ask that you will assure them that they are protected, that you will not betray them, that you will show them where you want them to enter into situations and if certain issues belong to them or not. God, thank you that you are their portion and their cup, that you make their lot secure, they do not have to worry. Lord temper their confidence with humility, their self assertiveness with vulnerability, so they can trust their boundary lines have fallen in pleasant places and surely they have a delightful inheritance in you. Thank you that you will go before them Lord and you will be their rear guard. Father nurture the seeds of leadership you have planted. Surround them with people that can speak straight to them, to confront or challenge but also to comfort and encourage. Lord help them to have open hands to receive your instruction and to trust that you, ultimately, are in control. That you are God, and they are not and there is an ease in releasing things to you. Thank you for their passion, may you refine it to be in alignment with yours. Bless them, Lord, I pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

If you are an Enneagram Eight, I hope you feel loved, seen, and blessed by this episode. I’m guessing if you know an Eight, they will appreciate that you’ve taken the time to learn more about how they view the world the way they do and that they are so much more than a number! Share this episode with them and a message about how you value their tenacious spirit.

The best is yet to come,

Episodes about the Enneagram Eight:

Spring Series: What You Need to Know About the Enneagram Eight! | Melanie Erickson

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